“Empathy is about standing in someone else’s shoes, feeling with his or her heart, seeing with his or her eyes. Not only is empathy hard to outsource and automate, but it makes the world a better place.” — Daniel Pink
Assholes, Jerks and Dickheads Are People Too - by Neil McGregor. Takeaway: “There is worrying trend on LinkedIn and in the business media in general. The labelling of people into categories labelled Assholes, Jerks and Dickheads. I have to say this worries me for a number of reasons, not the least of which, is the fact that some pretty heavy hitters are using the terms and in turn influencing many others to think along similar narrow minded lines. No doubt many if not all of us have had the unfortunate opportunity to work with some difficult folk, but labelling and discarding them helps no-one.” The article encourages empathy and staying focused on someone’s humanity.
Building Software with the Empathy Spectrum - by Andrea Goulet. Empathy is a skill, and requires context and cultivation. Leaders are wise to master it. “Empathy is a competitive advantage. It helps us build better products and solve better problems by getting to the heart of what’s important to those of us who are human — connection to each other. As leaders, it’s our job to build software organizations where empathy is encouraged and people can grow both intellectually and emotionally.”
Empathy - The Hidden Ingredient of Good Software Development (video) - by Daniel Bryant. Takeaway: “When gathering requirements and performing business analysis, it is obvious that the ability to experience from within another user/customer/being’s frame of reference is a valuable skill, but the same can be said when writing code. If we follow Martin Fowler’s train of thought where ‘any fool can write code that a computer can understand. Good programmers write code that humans can understand’ we can see that empathy is at the heart of this skill.”
Forming Stronger Bonds with People at Work - by Monica C. Worline, Jane E. Dutton and Ashley E. Hardin. Takeaway: “Too many people think of compassion and connection with others as a nice-to-have in organizations. But if people feel like they belong and genuinely care about one another, they will be more creative, resilient, and eager to contribute at work. It’s tempting to ignore distress, and suffering and pretend like they have no place in our offices. But the human experience of pain is going to show up, whether we invite it or not, and the only way to respond is with compassion.”
Hanlon’s Razor: Relax, Not Everything Is Out to Get You — by Farnam Street. Takeaway: Don’t assign malicious intent to people and situations when unintentional mistakes might be the cause of things not working as you’d expected or wanted.
How the Former CTO of Kickstarter Finds Meaning in Leading - by Michelle. Takeaway: a profile of James Turnbull that covers leadership basics but also delves into his thoughts and implementations of empathy, including his work at Empatico (a startup for facilitating empathy in schoolchildren).
Which Factors Shape Our Empathy? - by Emiliana R. Simon-Thomas. Takeaway: A summary of what empathy is from a neuroscientific and psychological approach, with a link to an empathy quiz included. Offered by UC Berkeley’s “Greater Good” magazine.
Your Most Important Skill: Empathy - by Chad Fowler. Takeaway: Includes a long-ish list of compelling reasons why empathy truly is your most important skill as a leader, and several suggestions on how to practice empathy: listen; watch and wonder; know your enemies, and choose the other side. “We all have friends and loved ones that complain to us about how they have been treated by other people. It’s human nature to complain and it’s the duty of a loved one to listen sympathetically. The assumption is that the listener is on the side of the complainer. A supportive friend or loved one almost always is, instinctually. Try practicing (internally) taking the opposing view point. Don’t go with your default reaction immediately. Start on the other side and work your way back.”
Don’t Worry About Failure…Embrace It! - by James Hood. Takeaway: “Treat each failed attempt as a learning experience. What went wrong that time? What can I do differently next time? Being kind to yourself and treating setbacks as learning opportunities is key to getting … onto a path of positive personal growth.”
Failure as a Service - by Rich Armstrong. What it means to be a leader. Takeaways: Servant-leaders shouldn’t make decisions that should be made by the folks closest to the problem), unless they can’t be answered with readily-available or easily-collected data, and there’s no consensus on the solution. “When the people you manage bring you a tough call, and you choose right, they get the credit. When you choose wrong, you get the blame. And it’s OK, pookie. That’s what you’re here for.”
Feelings of Failure - by Elad Gil. Takeaway: A post “meant to help with feelings of failure when things are actually going well (whether you as the CEO realize it or not).”
| Gratitude as a Company Value - by Anil Dash. Takeaway: Dash’s first few months as CEO at Fog Creek Software revealed that the company’s tradition of expressing genuine thanks to employees/coworkers has engaged him and others on an emotional level, which leads to a better culture. | [W]e should regularly take the time to show our colleagues, peers and collaborators that we’re thankful for their work.” |
A Trust Toolbox for Virtual Teams. Module 1: “The Prelude Game” - by Alexey Pikulev. Takeaway: A five-module framework for building trust, including sections on personal integrity and trust in action.
Building Trust Inside Your Team - by MindTools. Takeaway: Build trust inside teams via example-setting and clear communication.
Building Trust on Agile Teams - by Rachel Davies. Takeaway: Posits a trust equation—”T = C + R + I / S. The letters in this formula stands for, Trustworthiness = Credibility + Reliability + Intimacy all divided by Self-orientation, where: Credibility relates to expertise.”
Humans Hate Being Spun: How to Practice Radical Honesty — from the Woman Who Defined Netflix’s Culture - by FirstRound. Takeaway: “Too often, upper management thinks that sharing about problems confronting the business will heighten anxiety among staff, but what’s more anxiety provoking is not knowing. You can’t protect your people from hard truths anyway. And holding back the truth, or telling them half-truths, will only breed contempt. Trust is based on honest communication, and I find that employees become cynical when they hear half-truths.”
Our 6 Must Reads For Creating and Accelerating Trust on Teams - by FirstRound. Takeaway: Leave a good last impression (“[e]nd every meeting or conversation with the feeling and optimism you’d like to have at the start of your next conversation with the person”); give your most recent performance review to your final round candidates; don’t miss the Day One opportunity; write and distribute your user guide; reference the Trust Equation by Steven Drozdeck and Lyn Fisher; work toward a shared consciousness.
Team Trust Canvas - by In Team We Trust. Takeaway: a one-page planning canvas to help your team build trust explicitly.
Trust Anti-Pattern Cards - by In Team We Trust. Takeaway: a set of cards that cover antipatterns like blame, broken schedules, conflict. You can use the cards in retrospective exercises to identiy issues and resolve them.
Who Should Own Your Engineering Team’s Skill Debt? - by Oren Ellenbogen. Takeaway: “Increasing skill debt is an outcome of an organization where trust is deteriorating.” This is because lack of trust encourages people to stick to what they already know, instead of stretching their skills and knowledge and experimenting. This leads to stagnation. Watch out for lack of empathy, disinterest, blame and cynicism. Managers and team leads must work together to resolve.